I’ll tell you why. For the last … 3 months or so I’ve been dealing with Gout. What’s gout? Well, to keep this short, it’s the body (kidneys) inability to handle meat, alcohol, caffeine & legumes (even tofu), these foods are high in purines. Basically, it’s an accumulation of uric acid in the blood. When it arrives in your feet (cooler than your body), the salts in the uric acid solidify and settle. Causing immense pain (you limp a lot).
I’m about 14 days out with nearly no meat (a few pieces of ham) and no alcohol and no caffeine and no legumes (not even tofu). At this point I don’t have any clear idea as to what the near or distant future will bring.
So, if ya’ll could keep that in mind when you wonder WHAT THE HECK IS BIGGLES DOING WITH CARPAL TUNNEL ENTRIES ?!? Or, WHY THE HECK NO MEAT IN THAT BURGER ?!?
You know why. Now now, settle down. This by NO means spells disaster for Meathenge. I’m still going to be smoking, grilling and roasting new and different meat type recipes. Good stuff too, just won’t be eating much if any of it.
Please be ready for different types of entries here and understand the reasoning behind it. It’s what’s going on here at Meathenge Labs. And that is that.
Onward …
Earlier this week I splurged on a few Portabella mushrooms. I say splurged cause they’re 10 dollars a pound. At this price, maybe we should be cultivating our own Portabellas.
These things are touted as being like meat, or something. I’ve had them before and I’ve seen vegetarians eat them. But I’ve never had any that tasted as good as they did last night. Not even ONCE.
Fire up the grill first, get the mesquite going and come back inside.
I don’t know nothin’ about marinating no mushrooms for grilling. Since some people serve them as meat, I decided to treat them as meat. But since they are large sponges, I decided to marinate them for only 15 to 20 minutes at room temperature. I also used a spray of Extra Virgin Olive Oil, not a huge amount. Just enough to coat, twice. Then I sprinkled on some Tony Chaceres Creole Seasoning, very salty & has some kick. Then I sprinkled some of my own Mexicanny dry rub over, just a bit. It has a base of Paprika, then some onion powder, cayenne, black pepper, two kinds of chile powder, oregano, touch of cinnamon and some salt. And maybe ground celery seed if I have them. Then lightly over the gills a squeeze of fresh lemon juice. Set aside.
Go play with the fire to see how it’s going.
Tomatoes are a funny beast. Ya can’t put them in the fridge, they lose flavor. And if you’re buying grocery store ‘maters, they don’t have much flavor to begin with. So, I let them sit out on the counter to get over-ripe. They still need help though. They get some marinating too. Far simpler than the shrooms though. Just some of your best EVOO, another bit of fresh lemon juice and some nice aromatic Mexican Oregano, salt & pepper. Easy.
Go poke the fire, lay out the coals and lower the cooking surface. Scrub & make nice.
Slice up some red onions to grill, they good.
You’ll also want to pull out your favorite bottled Que sauce or make your own. It was Thursday night and had only 2 muchrooms to cook. I sure as hell wasn’t going to make my own sauce. So I used my Iron Horse sauce. Quite sweet, but with some tangy on the end.
Slice out some cheese you think might melt nicely. I had some swiff cheese handy.
Grill them over direct heat. Toss your red onions on and cook until almost done. You’ll want them to hold up on your sammich. When the shrooms are 3/4 done, slather on the sauce! Caramelize the sauce well, more flavor. Slather sauce on maybe two or three times. On the last time, put yer cheese over the gills and close the lid to your grill. Just barely long enough to melt the cheese, pull.
The Open Face Portabella Burger was very very very good. I could do it again tonight. The smiley marinated ‘maters were a delight. The onions were cooked just right, not raw, but not all slimy either, nice & sweet. The mushrooms performed their jobs perfectly. Spicy & chewy & sweet fromt the sauce. All this sitting on a bed of way too fresh red leaf lettuce. I used some thick french toast bread that mama bought, it got a thin layer of mayo, then fancy Dijon Mustard. Mama and I both remarked together, “Hey, this is really good!” Not a bad response for a mushroom sammich from Meathenge Labs. A very pleased Biggles is now leaving the room.
Xo Xo
dude, bummer about the gout. Feel better soon! Meanwhile, yummy sammy. If you can eat eggs & cheese, you will be home free, and even if not, you can try some japanese recipes or suchlike. Soba noodles are weirdly satisfying.
Hey Nerd,
Should I be searching for food stuffs described at weirdly satisfying? YES. I haven’t much experience with Asian cooking, but it looks as though I’ll be heading that direction in no time. Today I had a Chile Relleno lunch plate at a local place. It was so good I’m nearly inspired to write up a review. I just don’t have the time though.
Oddly enough, I feel just fine. Now. I miss the meat!
Biggles
I can’t say I have the gout. But I absolutely have the GUT! I need to cut back on the meat and alchohol to cure that problem, too!
Good luck on your recovery!
Biggles – Near disaster! I hope that the gout mysteriously vanishes and never returns, but I’m glad to hear that you feel alright. But I’m going to cook the mushrooms that are in my fridge on the grill tonight because these sound so good.
I must admit that I have avoided looking at your blog for the longest time because I am a vegetarian and figured it had nothing to offer me…
Then I take a peek and you are cooking portabellas and can’t eat much meat. Crazy world.
My sympathies on the gout. I have heard it is excessively painful. But being a veg isn’t so bad. There are about 10,000 things you can do with brussels sprouts.
no no NOOOOOOOOOoooooooo!!!
Well okay. Two words. Nettles Frittata. And beets. And roasteda carrots. Ok, that’s seven words but you get where I’m going with this. Speedy healing.
Hey Suebob,
Yeah, I don’t blame you. Any decent self respecting vegetarian should steer WIDE from a web site called Meathenge.
As you can probably gather, I don’t take myself too seriously and you may find something worth reading from time to time.
The next 6 months should be quite interesting. Eh?
Biggles
Hi Molly!
It’s good to see yah. Hey, I’m a fan of the Frittata. And those young nettles looked fine to me. It’s really going to take me some time to get my act together. Vegetables have never been a main source of a meal for me. Tofu & Tempe & beans, yes. I’ll need to start up a daily/weekly menu I can integrate without making myself crazy. My wife is more than willing to join my new Way. But the chillin’s won’t be able to deal with everything I’ll be cooking. I’ll end up doing two dinners, which I do on many occasions anyway. Life has rarely been boring for Biggles. All is well.
Xo Xo
Not sure if it was a joke or not, but SueBob is right about brussel sprouts 10,000 ways. They’re one of my faves. Right after meat, that is.
Also, I’ve been working on the perfect roasted cauliflower. I’m getting there. The key is heavy carmelization, but not at the expense of mushiness. Anyway, when you get it right it’s fantastic.
Sorry to hear about your gout, but am glad you’re cutting your purine foods. Gout can be very hard on the body; I lost a loved one to it.
I found lots of information about how to grow mushrooms at a site that looks like they might grow the non-edible kind, but it’s a LOT more information that what I found at the edible mushroom sites that offer to sell kits.
http://www.shroomery.org/index/par/3
oh sorry to hear bout your pain dude,I’m learning from you/your account of this situaton…..no caffine ahhhhhhhhhh,we grill tons of portabella’s at my restaurant job,so alot of people are on the same track as you
Hi everyone,
Thank you for all your support and Comments. I’m going to be looking in to the roasted cauliflower real soon, I’m quite hungry. Not sure if I can deal with the B. Sprouts. I don’t enjoy having vegetables in my mouth. Gives me the jeebies.
Biggles
My wife has just come down with the gout. Since she is the disciplinarian at work she is now being called Mrs. Goutfire.
I’ll be interested to hear how the diet works out since it is something we will have to deal with as well.
Hey Haddock,
It depends on how bad the gout is and what caused it. My sore feet went away in a day and a half when I stopped eating meat and drinking. Now I just need to find my niche, diet and swing of things. Not having pate & salumi is killing me. My psyche is all hyped out.
Biggles! The gout sounds awful! Take care and I wish you a speedy, speedy recovery. I’ll eat an extra slice of morning bacon in your honor…
hey biggles — if it’s cauliflower you’re cookin’, try this out: http://www.paisleysky.net/foodnerd/archives/2004_11.html#000107
makes ’em all roasty, spicy, and brown. 🙂
Dr. Biggles,
I’m sorry about your dilemma. I truly am. In fact, my heart sank a little when I read your post. The worst part is how Kafka-esqe it all seems. A guy who writes about his love for meat who contracts a condition where he can’t eat meat. Why does irony at it’s cruelest seem so drunkenly absurd?
The other day I was in Staples returning something my boss told me to get after he changed his mind. When the cashier took his stapler to staple the old receipt to the new “returned” receipt, he didn’t have any staples, and I just said “forget it” and walked out.
Such is the world we live in. Broach it with a smile, a portabello burger, and lots of love.
Kevin
Hey Meg, Hey Kevin,
Thanks for stopping by, it does help. And yeah, very Kafka-esqe. No more Meat-esqe. Feh. It’s okay because I just love cauliflower.
Biggles
Jeez, Doc B,
I’m so sorry to hear about your gout… But your meat marinades and cooking methods should transfer nicely to a wide variety of goodies. And going ETOH free isn’t so bad – I’ve been essentially alcohol-free for four months now… Sparkling water accompanies most food as well as beer, I swear!
Hey Alice,
4 MONTHS ?!?!? Wow. I am impressed.
I think it will take me a while to get things straightened out. My mind isn’t convinced vegetables & sparkling water is the same as a roast turkey dinner or pate or smoked pork butt or saucy grilled chicken with Pate or duck. Ya know?
Hey Doc,
Found your site while googling up ‘alchohol and gout’. My best find on the subject was a book by Dr. Norman Walker-“Fresh Fruit and Vegetable Juices; what’s missing from your body”. He gives quite a treatment on all that stuff along with the juice treatment. I’m just getting back into it after ten years because of gout and sciatic. Good Luck!
Hey John,
Yes !!! I attempt to do a half squozed lemon in a glass of water each morning. Gout or no, it feels GREAT. Cherry juice is also quite a fine way to go, hear it can take the place of one of the gout medicines. Cherry juice good, cept the darned stuff is so expensive.
For me, it’s all about keeping the glasses of water up and a low purine diet. I’m still eating whole grains though, it isn’t that bad.
Portion control is doing it for me. You see, I’m a big guy, 6’2″ and 215. A light green salad and toast just won’t do it for dinner, ya know? It’s tough.
Biggles
Hi John:
Just wondering how you are getting on with the gout. I’ve got it bad and want all the advice I can get.
Hey Richard,
Not sure how John is doing. I’m doing better, I suppose. It’s a lifestyle change and that’s the toughest part. Very little alcohol, meat, gravy and/or pate. Low purines and exercise, unfortunately is the way. I don’t like it any more than anyone else.
Take care,
Biggles
Hey guys, i’m 35 fit as a fiddle biking some 200 miles a week and bang I get gout, ouch it really hurts especially at night, can’t sleep, foot up in the air to ease the blood pressure, anyway, no booze or red meat and shrimp and lobster, that’t what did it for me, I had the problem two years ago, and was very careful then thought ah i’ll be ok, 6 months of booze and not alot like 2-3 beers a week, and the mussles etc…..I can’t go though it again, so it’s back to pasta, bread, lots of fruit smoothies, yogurt, cheese and I will eat a bit of chicken but not more than a deck of cards worth at a time. We have to go with our bodies not against it. please email if you want to talk more about it. hatstoyou at sympatico dot ca
good luck
Hey Dustin,
Thanks for stopping by!
Holy crap. You’re all fit an junk. Did you have a doctor run a blood test? Seems painfully young and that much alcohol is basically NOTHING.
I don’t eat a lot of red meat anyway. It was the gravy, pate and sausage that did it for me. Plus I’m not nearly active enough.
Man, I wish I had time to rid 200 miles a week.
Biggles
I have had two out breaks of gout in two months. I am having a hard time finding the specific diet I need to be on. I do not eat anything on the lists I have seen. The worst part for me, is that people who have not had gout do not realize how painfull it is. I never call in sick, and have had to do so twice in the last two months.
Hey Tracey,
First thing you need to do is see a doctor and get a blood test. This way they can see what your blood is up to.
If you’re on a low carb, high protein diet? That will cause gout as well. You need to find a diet that’s low in purines. Do a search on google for low purine diet and that’ll get you in the right direction. You’ll be surprised at what foods are high in purines, I was.
Go see your doctor!
xo, Biggles
hey man I have had the same gout attcak for almost 3 months it will get better but never goes all the way away and then it hits real bad again any ideas
Hey John,
You need to see your doctor and get a blood test and some pills. Need something to decrystalize the salts in your blood! Plus, you need to lower the purines in your diet. Just google low purine diet and you’ll figure it out real quick like. Get to it!
Biggles